I've been neglecting the two people that read my blog. I'm sorry. Having three children is not as easy as I thought it would be. *insert humungous eye roll here* It's always more work than I remember, but with each child, seems a little less stressful. My youngest is an angelic little pixie barely able to raise my dander even when she's at her absolute naughtiest! Here...Look...

Who could possibly get upset with her?! I don't mean to toot my own horn, but she is adorable!!! Since I last posted I've attended a graduation, spent time with old friends, done a bit of needle felting, celebrated Memorial day with family, and FINALLY...after MUCH TOO LONG, spent a whole weekend with my husband! We only had the baby to care for and since her vocabulary is minimal and her few words come out dripping with sugary sweetness, we enjoyed our time together immensely. Looking at her, we both were able to appreciate the life we've created together. Life is exactly what keeps us from appreciating what we've accomplished on most days. There is no room to breathe. No room to converse. No time to just hug and inhale one another deeply and quietly. But this weekend we did. For me, it was exactly what I needed. GramPam ran off with our little munchkins and didn't return them until late Sunday afternoon. Here is an example of what I'm sure their weekend looked like.

This woman will go to any extreme to engage my children in creative and active play! She listens to my children's wildest dreams and then, helps them to bring those dreams into reality. 

Yikes, what massive mood swings I'm experiencing! Every month around this time I map out my future which includes getting a divorce, losing 50 pounds over night, wrapping up all unfinished craft projects, and leaving my children along the side of the road with a note attached saying "Take good care of these kids. Their mother has gone to seek herself and is positively sure that she will hate what she finds and therefore drown herself in booze and literary endeavors of the tangential sort and amass a pile of incomplete artisitic projects just as she did when she stayed where she was but is no longer because she couldn't take it!" I could leave the kids with my husband but I'm quite sure they'd have Laffy Taffy and sausages for dinner every night and wear their pajamas to school. I just couldn't take anymore embarrassment given the fact that everyone would already know I had left them.

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?

PLEEEEEEAASE, Does anyone hear me? HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?

I've been here for almost eight years now, can someone help me? Why isn't anyone looking at me? I keep screaming and everyone just walks by, occasionally you look at me, but you don't seem to care.

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO???!!!

I've spent the time here talking to myself. Obviously, I'm my own best friend and worst enemy. WOW, at least I can avoid the mirror here. It's such a dark place. I'm glad I don't have to spend too much time worrying about the way I look. I feel so alone. All I have are my thoughts to keep me company. Well, that and all the things I have to do. Waking everyone up, getting people dressed, making meals, doing dishes, doing laundry, driving to and from schools, cleaning spills, brushing teeth, washing little hands, packing lunches, cleaning the toilet, sink, and tub, holding, rocking, singing, cuddling, comforting, reassuring, supporting, and encouraging others. It all sounds rewarding, productive, right? RIGHT???

Hmm, no one hears me? HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! How long should a person scream before they give up? Oh my god, I feel like I can't breathe!!! HELLOOOOOO?! I. CAN'T. BREATHE.

Oh, wait, no nevermind, I'm OK, I'm breathing, I'm OK. WHEW. I'm glad I'm still here.

Wait...HERE. Where is here? What am I doing here? How did I get here? HELLOOOOOO? Can someone wake me up, talk to me, let me know I'm here? Does anyone see me. I'm talking to you!

Coffee shops have always been a place of respite for me, delivering the warmth and indulgence that I so rarely get since I'm always caring for others. Lately I've noticed that it seems to also be an office space for those who have no desire to interact but crave the din of human voices. Just not tiny human voices. God help me if I take my children in the coffee shop with me! It's as if there are only a few places you are allowed to go once you have children, those places being: